they come into the world. Programmed to love. All babies . . . even you. Think
about that children’s book you liked when you were small. You still wanted
your mom. You loved her.”
He furrows his brow and withdraws his hand, fisting it against his chin.
“No,” he whispers.
“Yes. You did.” My tears flow freely now. “Of course you did. It wasn’t an
option. That’s why you’re so hurt.”
He stares at me, his expression raw.
“That’s why you’re able to love me,” I murmur. “Forgive her. She had her own
world of pain to deal with. She was a shitty mother, and you loved her.”
He gazes at me, saying nothing, eyes haunted—by memories I can’t 474 | P
a g e
E L JAMES
begin to fathom.
Oh, please don’t stop talking.
Eventually he says, “I used to brush her hair. She was pretty.”
“One look at you and no one would doub一t that.”
“She was a shitty mother.” His voice is barely audible. I nod and he closes
his eyes. “I’m scared I’ll be a shitty father.”
I stroke his dear face. Oh my Fifty, Fifty, Fifty. “Christian, do you think for one
minute I’d let you be a shitty father?”
He opens his eyes and gazes at me for what feels like an eternity. He smiles
as relief slowly illuminates his face. “No, I don’t think you would.” He caresses
my face with the back of his knuckles, gazing at me in wonder. “God, you’re
strong, Mrs. Grey. I love you so much.”
He leans forward and kisses my forehead. “I didn’t know I could.”
“Oh, Christian,” I whisper, trying to contain my emotions.
“Now, that’s the end of your bedtime story.”
“That’s some bedside story . . . ”
He smiles wistfully, but I think he’s relieved. “How’s your head?”
“My head?” Actually, it’s about to explode with all you’ve told me!
“Does it hurt?”
“No.”
“Good. I think you should sleep now.”
Sleep! How can I sleep after all that?
“Sleep,” he says sternly. “You need it.”
I pout. “I ha一ve one question.”
“Oh? What?” He eyes me warily.
“Why ha一ve you suddenly become all . . . forthcoming, for want of a better
word?”
He frowns.
“You’re telling me all
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